Category: Musings

A Lost Day or a Dream Come True?

Samoa lost a day the other day. A whole flipping day! They decided to cross the international dateline for economic reasons, so that their businesses can be ‘closer’ to Australia and New Zealand. This, along with the ever decreasing return that is the celebration of new years, got me thinking.
I seem to lose days sometimes. I am not sure what happens but then it is suddenly evening and almost over. It’s not like I even do anything that productive during those days. They slip by in a haze, maybe because of inertia or maybe because of a hangover or whatever. This can be so disappointing, especially for one who professes to believe that we only have one life, ‘Carpe Diem’ and all that!
This year I celebrated my fiftieth new year on this planet. Fifty years of existence and of course I wonder about my achievements. But there is a problem with measuring achievement. Many choose to measure their lives in terms of ‘things’; material things, money or how far they have gone in their careers. These are tangible and easy to measure, and this is why people choose to measure them perhaps. But of course these things don’t last and are ultimately meaningless. I feel that when we measure ourselves with such things we forget the impermanence of our existence.
Others may choose to measure things in terms of happiness, surely a more difficult thing to measure. How happy are we? How happy are our friends and families? How can we tell?
And yet people insist on periodically attempting to measure such things and the new year is one of those times.
I have always felt the new year rituals to be disappointing. It is simply another day passing and yet some people almost feel desperate to enjoy themselves. Or at least show others they are enjoying themselves. Have you ever been that single person longing for a kiss as the chimes strike midnight? Only to find you are the over-looked wallflower?
The other new year ritual that leads to disappointment is the idea of ‘resolutions’. To me it seems that often planning things or setting goals are inevitably going to lead to a sense of failure. Too many times have I made to do lists or promised myself some great achievement over the last fifty years, only to feel like a failure when I didn’t achieve it all.
So this year, no more resolutions or promises. I choose to replace them with dreams. I know this year that some of my dreams may come true but some may not, and this is ok, because they are but merely dreams after all. Big ones and small ones.
I also know that there are times when I am so busy, and perhaps tired, that I dream of losing a day, a day doing nothing. So, for me, maybe I should relish the lazy day with nothing accomplished. It wasn’t wasted, it was a dream come true…
I hope some of your dreams come true this year…

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What does the Elephant dream?

© 2011 Simon Poore

by simontall

Music, Performing Monkeys and being ‘Creative’…

‘Will’ – Click to listen…

Today I am thinking about music. Music has always been a big part of my life, an inspiration, and something that I know that I never do enough of. I have been playing and writing music since I was about fifteen or sixteen and now in my ripe old age I still harbour ambitions of being an international rock star…

I have included some music that I wrote about 6 or 7 years ago, which I rediscovered recently. Maybe it might be music to write a masterpiece to? I wrote it for a school production of Phillip Pullman’s ‘Northern Lights’ (or ‘The Golden Compass’ as it is known in the States). This was an amazing performance by children, all the animals were puppets, and Pullman himself even showed up to see it. Never got to find out what he thought…

Last Saturday I did one of my rare solo gigs in a pub nearby, and despite only about 4 and a half minutes rehearsal, I somehow managed to pull it off. Yes there was the odd mistake and, at the time, I felt hot, disappointed and frustrated because people didn’t seem to be listening. I felt a bit like a fraud; like a performing monkey on a rainy day. People notice the monkey but aren’t throwing coins as they hurry past under big black umbrellas.

Of course, in retrospect, this was a foolish feeling. But then I am often foolish and rash, a trait I like because it keeps me in touch with my younger self; that self that is still inside me reminding me to have fun. The younger self that yearned to be a rock star. Imagine doing what you truly love and getting paid for it? That self never went away, even though when you are young, you are constantly told you will grow out of it. I wonder if my mother still thinks I will ‘grow out’ of playing the guitar?

The gig, in reality, was actually a success. I got applause and someone even told me I have an amazing voice (they must have been drunk!). The point is that I wrote those songs and some people liked them. Just like I write stories and some people like them (others don’t of course, you should see my reviews on Barnes and Noble!).

I am not posting this to boast, but it’s often hard to feel proud of ones creations. We are precious about them because we nurture them like children, so criticism and indifference stings. But always remember that there is always that one person, sitting in the corner at the back of the pub, unnoticed beyond the rowdiness of the crowd, who is listening intently and loves what you do. You create for them…

What do you think?

This post was inspired by two people. First the lovely Nikki McCormack – known as @neyska on twitter; she kindly requested to hear some music by me. Check her blog here: Neyska. The second inspiration was Derek Flynn, who always posts fun music he makes on his blog on a Monday, so I thought I would give it a try! Check Derek on twitter – @derekf03 and his ranting blog here – Rants etc. Thanks to those guys! As always all comments gratefully received!

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The Performing Monkey?

© 2011 Simon Poore

by simontall